When I say, I am vanishing inside and no one can hear me. Clearly making gurgling sounds drowning in my own tears. Poison and a parasite. Draining everything from me. Negativity allowing me to feel at my lowest.
Leave me alone, I try and scream but never shy away. Leaving a trace of disparities as I evolve into something like hopelessness. Never letting my grip go, I tend to cry and in the same instant, I’ve discovered myself cold and numb.
Searching for a mound of light only to find the fire already lit and ignited to a higher flame generating so much more devastation because it is not contained. Allowing myself to consume feelings of this hurt that in which I touch.
Time refurbishes all wounds, leaving scars with memories under bedded within. I am just going to sit here and make believe these red laces of heat touching me are heavenly. Without feelings, emotionally drained.
Something I was told I was supposed to do, but I am not sure if they meant embrace it even if it was trying to kill you. Frustrated over the thought of what happened and most days it is over the top visual and I feel everything. Not sure if I am supposed to act like I am good or just wallow away.